Reunions, Reminiscence & Reflection: Stories to Tell

Last week I gazed at photos from my fortieth high school reunion. Some people looked exactly the same, but most had changed. Some were thinner, some were heavier, many were gray-haired. I spent the most time looking at pictures of the girls I had placed on pedestals during high school—the pretty, the popular, the thin. I was so hard on myself then. Sometime during the past forty years I came to accept who I am—the good and the bad—and it was immensely satisfying to realize that I am okay with all of it.

As I reminisced about my personal journey, I thought about reminiscence literature itself, which is based on the act of reflecting upon one’s past and the idea that it helps individuals, especially older adults, achieve closure, acceptance, forgiveness and wholeness—and that these feelings in turn improve that individual’s quality of life in the present.

I also thought about the clients with whom I have worked and the natural storytelling that occurs as one sorts through his or her own possessions. Senior move managers instinctively understand the importance of listening to clients’ stories. Always pragmatic, we believe that the act of reminiscing helps clients realize that they can take memories with them without taking the things themselves. But I realize now that reminiscence is much more than just that. Reflecting about the past helps clients integrate the varied aspects of their lives and achieve acceptance, cohesion and peace.

It is this renewed appreciation of the value of reminiscence that I wish to share with my employees, my fellow senior move managers, and the many adult children with whom we work. The stories that parents tell, whether for the first or fiftieth time, have a function that extends far beyond the immediate context. Listen and value their communication. Know that the telling helps integrate a lifetime of experiences and enhances the experience of the present as well. A story is much more than a story. Accepting oneself is a precious rite of passage in which, by listening, we play a privileged role.

Posted in Communicating with Loved Ones, Inspirational Memoirs, Senior Moving Solutions